Jonny Miller x Behind the Human
Jonny Miller x Behind the Human

Jonny Miller x Behind the Human

🏔️ My Journey to Becoming Less Emotionally Numb

After burning out as a startup founder, — I was living in Brighton, UK and my fiancée at the time suffered from an anxiety attack which led her to taking her own life.

The journey through grief that ensued (I gave a TEDx talk on this) both turned my life upside down and led to deep dive explorations into my relationship to emotions and the nervous system (I consider myself relatively numb from the neck down prior to this)

Fast-forward to today, I teach a program called ‘Nervous System Mastery’ which over 1000 students have taken teaching what I consider to be a fundamental skillset for thriving in an increasingly dysregulated culture.

📣 Topics I love talking about

I spend most of my timing sharing and guiding students through three essential nervous system skills:

  1. Improving Interoception ~ attuning to your internal moment to moment experience and listening to the feedback coming from your body.
  2. Learning Self-Regulation ~ specifically ‘bottom-up’ approaches that tend to be far more effective for shifting your state than typical top-down cognitive reframes etc. as well as how to expand your capacity to be with greater intensity without shutting down.
  3. Embracing Emotional Fluidity ~ the path of gradually welcoming + accepting rather than resisting the full spectrum of our emotional experience (this is what most of the work leads up to, but requires some capacity for interoception + being with intensity) Making the case that engaging in somatic-based therapy approaches has a disproportionately high ROI vs. traditional top-down talk therapy (CBT etc.)

Additional 🌶-takes:

  • State Over Story — the science behind how breathwork practices create measurable shifts in your blood chemistry, which are far more effective for managing anxiety + overwhelm (I’ve shared more here)
  • Why embracing anger is the antidote for people pleasing - I spent a long time exploring for myself the difference between being nice vs being kind (the caveat being that it’s not expressed at someone else)
  • You are not responsible for triggering others — which relates to the distinction between caregiving vs. caretaking (the former coming from compassion without agenda, the latter a response because you are uncomfortable with their emotional experience)
  • The Myth of Fact over Feelings — why the best decision making is actually emotional (I wrote a short essay on this here)
  • The Concept of Self-Improvement is inherently shame-inducing — the self-help industry begins with the flawed assumption that we need fixing in some way. The alternative to this is to begin with the premise of ‘what if nothing needs fixing’ and seeing what unfolds from there.

🚀 A Few of My Favourite Tweets